Nature and Nurture

By Miss Ng Chin Wing Karen

 

As parents, there are always tons of questions we have been asking ourselves. Are we doing the right things in front of our children? Do we provide them with amble opportunities to explore their potentials? Do we really understand our children’s feelings? The concept of nature and nurture first came to my mind when my professor shared this concept with me in a lecture about child psychology and parenting. This concept has been embedded in my mind and has inspired me to nurture my child. 

 

Ever since my son, Skyler, was born, he has changed my life. Whenever my friends and family members see my son, they usually ask me a few similar questions. Why can he focus on doing certain things for a long time? Why can he observe something that others may not notice? Why can he be so calm when other toddlers mess around with their toys? It seems that he has been acting like this since he could walk around and communicate with others. I think it is to do with the concept of nature. His personality traits and preferences are based on the genes he was born with. He has been acting like this naturally with his genes. Without doubt, the concept of nature plays a significant role in the development of children’s individuality.

 

However, the concept of nurture also has great influence on children’s individuality. Children can be affected by the environment in which they grow up. Environmental factors refer to life experience and the people involved in their childhood. Since Skyler was born, I have always been thinking of what I can do to nurture him to be an empathetic and caring person. I came across some difficulties at the beginning. He hasn’t had much social contact with other children due to the COVID-19 pandemic. Without some solid experience of getting along with other children, it is difficult for him to know how to care for others. Thus, I have adopted some effective strategies from then on. I have created some imaginary plays in which my son can learn how to feel how others feel. For instance, I set up a tea party with his toys all sitting around him as if he was having afternoon tea with them. This was how he learnt to share his food at first. Seeing him throw his toys on the floor, I always tell him that they are in great pain and he has to hug and comfort them. As time goes by, he realises what he does may hurt others’ feeling. This is how he has learnt to stop throwing toys on the floor and even better, he can play with other children peacefully. I believe the concept of nurture is also vital for the development of children’s individuality.

 

    Raising a child is full of surprises. We wonder why our children act in certain ways. Somehow we can’t help seeing ourselves in our children. Through our children, we sometimes see what we may not like about ourselves. As parents, we realise that not only do we need to teach our children to be better, but ourselves too. This motivates us to learn to be a better person and gives us fascinating insights in life experience we can provide for our children. Therefore, the concept of nature is interwoven with that of nurture, which inspires us to see our children from different perspectives and guide them in different ways.